Strat Plan

Today:

Movies with Shanus and siblings. Probs Warhorse. Time pending.

We have lots of food and liquor. Come get it later if you please.

Tomorrow:

We can do whateva you like.

Wednesday:

Amber's show in Hyde Park and Hump Party at Czar.

Thursday:

Andrews arriving at night. they will probs just wanna chill after the drive.

Friday:

Filthy Friday!

Saturday:

Blow shit up at Kelsey's


Like I said, please edit and add things.

CARL

A gift for you all

Now if only santa had left something like him under the tree. Anyways, hope y'all have a Merry Christmas with your families. Eat the food, enjoy the presents, drink the drinks, you know be jolly and stuff. Ok, so I'll talk to you later, just wanted to say Joyeux Noel.

Love,

Kelsey

Yo Dawg...

I herd u lyke free cover...

http://www.filthyparty.com/

Sign up to get covered for free cover in da club

White Christmas

Beach. Tomorrow. Call me bitches.

CARL

P.S. Oh shit you have a yard sale. Still call me bitches.

Watching Bourne Identity

Matt Damon

Can Brandon Flowers' voice be my religion?

Tyson Ritter will be the temple. And my sacred text is just the lyrics that feed my soul.

Civil Engineering

Infrastructure is currently minimal, but it is foreseeable that a full-scale blanket study fortress could be constructed by the end of finals.

Screw bitches, get money.

(757):

Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.

(1-757):

It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.

I like watching the internet squirm as finals approach.

K.D.

This whole, changing the color of the background every time I copy paste is getting annoying. I dunno how to fix it.

Local celebrities

Look Wonky we're in an Against Me! video....sorta. You can see the back of my sweaty head for a second before I tossed the crowd surfer off @ 2:30. That night was the bestest :)

Studying has reached critical mass, over and out

Yes ladies and gentlemen (of whom there are none on the blog...) it is that time once again. The time when I've been in my room studying for just long enough that I am now not only singing "Hips Don't Lie" by the fray very loudly in gringo spanish, but I am answering practices problems out loud to my self like so "a-dren-o-cor-tico-trophic hormone... BITCHES'

wonky

I feel like this picture describes my life,

K.D.

Oh Dooce, your insight into life astounds me.

"M&M's make everything better, even the bitter taste of awkward, lonely nights spent waxing my mustache instead of screwing my TA."

Talk me down from this french fry ledge...

Would Mc Donald's every day until finals be an awful, expensive thing? Yes. Does that make me stop wanting french fries? Not at all.

A wise man

This might be my favorite picture of all time

K.D.

So applicable to my life in every way

K.D.

Obsessed with these two songs...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=if-UzXIQ5vw&ob=av2e

Somehow I have overlooked this in figuring out what songs I think are the best songs ever. The mandolin is harmonic, but jarring at the same time, and pairs perfectly with the vocals. The lyrics are simply beautiful, vaguely painful, and poetic. It gives off so much emotion, without trying too hard. Michael Stipe's voice makes me feel every emotion all at once, and his dancing in this video makes my heart sing.

And...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZG72J2ylUGE&ob=av2n

Which I have always enjoyed, but only recently have I gained a massive appreciation for the lyrics. "I'm waiting for a revelation, I'm waiting for someone to count me in, Cause now I only see my dreams, in everything I touch, feeling cold hands on every thing that I love, cold like some magnificent skyline, out of my reach but always in my eye line." There is some emotion embedded in those words that is really hard to describe, but somehow these lyrics explain it perfectly.

K.D.

Ugh. I'm dying.

Theorem: Formal logic training blows.

Proof: Suppose R is a relation on MxS where M is the set of all math courses and S is the set of all students dumb enough to take math courses. Consider xRs, we see that for all s, if x=sets and logic, then s will be mind numbingly bored. Now considering lemma 15, pertaining to x and s, we see that if s is mind numbingly bored, x likes wankers in its mouth. Thus, if x is sets and logic, x blows.

QED bitches.

Frat girls

A dictionary of "little sisters"

(Insert Greek Letters) Groupie: Often a wallflower at parties, but she is at every formal (always with a different brother). I once heard of such a creature that slept with 6 brothers in two months...and they still let her hang out there.

(Insert Greek Letters) Sweetheart: A girlfriend, basically. She's been dating one brother for a while now. She's at formals, but she is purposefully a shadow at parties.

(Insert Greek Letters) Princess: She's friends with somebody (?). She is the life of every party, but is rarely asked to formal as a last resort. I mean, we can't have someone dancing on tables and dominating at cham-pong when we're trying to get with boring flusies.

Oh well, to the cocksuckers go the spoils. Right?

CARL

Life's too short to even care at all.

I finished my last exam before finals yesterday. We had a really amazing Veterans' Day ceremony where a WW2 vet came and talked to us and chorale sang. My best friend got to talk to Foster the People after their concert in Berlin last night and texted me on her international phone. I'm about to go on a lunch date with a guy. A really nice guy. Stand-by for apocalypse.

CARL

Things were going SO well until you started your crap

Fucking computer. You work, you don't, you work again, but for how long? Haven't I treated you right? I don't give you viruses from porn sites, I don't spill liquids on your keyboard, I don't play WoW. Sure, I may have dropped you... a few times, but really stop being a little bitch. You're a laptop, now get your shit together so I can keep wasting time on facebook!

Sincerely,

Wonky COMMA

Self-inflicted life rules whose self-inflection has been desired, but seriously lacking, for at least 5 years now...

1. Stand up straight
2. Floss
3. Stop staring for hours on end at the magic time displacer, also known as your laptop, you've let it displace far too many of your limited hours on this here Earth
   
4. Stop eating butter
5. Stop eating chocolate
6. Stop eating sinfully orgasmic combinations of butter and chocolate
7. Learn how to fall asleep like normal people
8. Wake up on time
9. Use this new found "morning time" to be productive
10. Good Lord, do some push ups or crunches or something, and throw in some yoga for good measure
    
11. Cardio (yes this word is a life rule unto itself)

Life goals I have succeeded in implementing:

1. Brushing my teeth twice daily (8th grade)
2. Washing my face twice daily (sophomore year of college)
3. Showering in the a.m. (this year of college)
   
4. Not leaving the house make-up less. (basically last year)
   
5. Buy and successfully eat vegetables, even if they only are green beans and spinach. (since I started feeding myself)

K.D.

When in the land of the Mormons

Cari, I'm pretty sure no one wins in the contest of "who's mathematics intensive, rigorous science subject matter is best?" Nope, all who play that game definitely lose.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEA! Now you can legally drink. Remember, with great power comes great work per second.

So, I am sick. Not horrendously, terribly sick, just a little. Yet somehow, I am pretty sure the lack of oxygen due to my body's inability to breath through my nose is going to give me brain damage. And yes, I have been breathing through my mouth, but somehow, despite the clearly larger volume of my mouth compared to my nostrils, I don't think I get as much air that way. So there's that. And then yesterday, I went into the wrong classroom, asked a girl if I could sit next to her, then realized I was in the wrong classroom and I had to leave. Admittedly I had only had 4 hours of sleep, but I'm gonna go ahead and blame the sickness for this one. And yesterday, I was so not in the mood to be bothered, and this damn annoying faced, khaki cargo pant, dressy polo, teva wearing, nerd kept talking to me in the class where if the professor hears you talking, HE WILL FREAKING SINGLE YOU OUT TO GROUCH AT YOU. It was all I could do to not be like, "yeah, my face might look I am a retarded mouth breather today, but at least it doesn't look like an annoying nerd's face like yours does every single day, so kindly shut up."

Also, cereal boxes lie about how much cereal is inside. I'm lucky if I get half as many servings out as they say I should.

all of my love,

K.D.

Trauma

I'm pretty sure the guy that owns the collegetown grocery store (and the drug smuggling it is a front for) knows me as the caffeine girl. I'm always running in the there in an act of desperation purchasing either coffee and milk or oj and redbull. I guess we can just both judge each other.

Note to self:

Stop drinking whiskey once you're a little drunk. We need to stop making this "sleeping on the bathroom floor" thing happen.

It never ends...

Even my bagel-procurement stand is ominous.

Making babies

It's just a typical Tuesday. Playing God with a population of gametes in my Hardy Weinberg Equilibrium simulator. It's kind of like The Sims without the bear skin rug and the weird language.

CARL (determined to revive this blog)

Norms

Living by myself for so long has allowed me to explore unconventional seating arrangements. Imagine what I would be like with zero social pressure. Probably a chimpanzee.

Bromance

"Look, baby, this is your old tooth-brushing glass. I kept it all the time to remind me of you."

"To remind you to brush your teeth."

"No. I have my own too. I kept this to remind me of you trying to brush away the Villa Rossa from your teeth in the morning, swearing and eating asprin and cursing harlots. Every time I see that glass I think of you trying to clean your conscience with a toothbrush...I will wait till I see the Anglo-Saxon brushing away harlotry with a toothbrush."

A Farewell to Arms - Ernest Hemingway

I kept reading this over and over again because it's too adorable and funny. I miss y'all.

CARL

Every time I hear this song...

I want to do this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3t8GdtYdRk0

wC

One more time, perhaps...

I need the current addresses for Cari and Lea, please... This should be the last time for a while. ;)

~bj

Pretense.

Being the 10th douchebaggyest wasn't good enough for me. I had to go for numero uno.

http://www.gq.com/entertainment/humor/201108/douchiest-colleges-america-2011#slide=1

CARL

:)

Thanks, Kelsey, for the warm wishes, and thanks to everyone for coming to my big day. We had a really, really great time, and we hope you did too!

Here are a couple of pictures, just for fun.

Holy Cow, Bethany is getting married today.

Who would have thought, all those years ago, when a certain gifted teacher who shall not be named was making us make a blog, for what now seems like no apparent reason, that one day we would be posting about one of us getting married....that certainly warrants a blog post I do believe.

So here's to Bethany and Justin, may they have a splendid life together forever and ever.

All of my love,

K.D.

Blog is sad, let's make it less sad.

Let's see, what interesting things do I have to say? Not many but....

Bethany, I had quite a nice time at your shower yesterday, it was really fun.

Jim got a big bottle of wine last night, I drank most of it. Sheesh.

School starts tomorrow, balls! At least I get my loan next week.

Cari and Christina, I miss you guys...will either of you be here after Bethany's wedding?

So yeah, that's all,

all of my love,

K.D.

I am the greatest man that ever lived

I love the way my feet look when I actually bother to paint my toe nails. Carl m'dear, could you be so kind as to post where we can send you letters/lots of explicit naked photos when you are at training ;) thanks!

wonky COMMA

Making banana pancakes...

I will soon be sending out wedding invitations, and I need your updated addresses. I'm not sure who's here and who's elsewhere, so can I please have the address where you can receive mail in about one to three weeks?

Thanks!

bj

Review: Thor

Basic premise: Super hot Norse god falls from the sky to give sweet lovings to an overworked astrophysicist girl. Then he goes back through the wormhole to his own dimension and they go back about their business.

Most epic nerdy girl fantasy?

Like even better than lumberjacks?

A metaphor for my recent sexcapades?

In any case, it gives me hope.

Also, the best scene:

IN A CAFE:

THOR: *drinks coffee* This is good.

PHYSICS INTERN: Hell yeah it is.

THOR: ANOTHERRRRRR! *violently smashes cup on floor*

PHYSICIST: You could have said that more politely.

Love you K.D. :)

CARL

Honey Badger don't care

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r7wHMg5Yjg

(On bad boys)

I do understand the appeal of wanting to spend time with a man based solely on his physical appearance, but you always have options. Instead of actually dating somebody like that, you need to have a bit of self-respect--so have a one-night stand with him and then move on. A guy like that is usually only good for sex anyway, and even that wears off once you firgure out he eats Marlboros for breakfast.
-Chelsea Handler

Sorry for two slutty posts in a row, but this was too funny not to share. It is in May's Cosmo which I am going to pretend I bought just because it had Hayley Williams on the cover.

CARL

Why I wear python cowboy boots:

Reason 1:
It takes serious balls to approach a girl wearing python cowboy boots. Thus, it eliminates frivolous conversation with pansy motherfuckers.

Reason 2:
Python cowboy boots are luxurious and they can hold necessary accessories such as a phone and a card wallet. They therefore eliminate the need to carry (and probably drunkenly misplace) a designer handbag.

Reason 3:
FUCKING BOOTFLASK!

nerd sniping

I just read the words "gravitational waves" and grinned uncontrollably and became excited for a second at the prospect of learning about them at some point. There may be something wrong with me.

K.D.

Hey yo Bethany!

Have you sent out your save the dates yet? Just wanna make sure it wasn't lost in the mail or anything :)

mo

So today...

I had a man who achieved his undergrad in literature (not that there is a damn thing wrong with that), and continued to become an evolutionary biologist that studies social systems, inform me that evolution was the basis of all science, proceed to affirm that all science is unequivocally rooted in evolution (in more or less words), and then he proceeded to list out ecology, physiology, and various forms of sociology as "all science."

Fantastic.

K.D.

Drunken Gummi Bears

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2Ggq1A/www.instructables.com/id/Drunken-Gummies-Vodka-Infused-Gummi-Bears/step1/Wait-for-it/

How to trap a hipster

J'hate daylight savings time. It's already 8-o-clock! I have done nothing all day! I googled us today for fun, we are the first and only (as far as I saw) lisforgifted. Go us!

WonkY COMMA

Paging Dr. Faggot... Dr. Faggot...

My penis and ears have lately become connected...now, if a hot chick says something stupid, it don't work. "Coldplay is awesome." You broke it.

What does it mean when you have a crystallizing moment of understanding redox reactions while in your sleep? Something awesome, or terrible? Either way, spring break needs to be here, and until then I will eat pretty much just popcorn and coffee and listen to The Killers and Coldplay. College.

K.D.

I never had a summer of '69...

Bloody Mary's lackin' in tobasco. Orgo: mind expanding? mind exploding? mind exfoliating? Yes. Save some face, you know you've only got one. There's a pretty bitchin' blanket fort in mine and Lea's living room right now. I must confess, my heart's in broken pieces and my head's a mess. I'm gonna be belligerated over spring break, and am hoping to do so with my non fla residing gorgeous gals. You bought a new bag of pot so let's make a new start, and that's the way to my heart...the way to my heart. Anyone else want to see Rango? I know I do. I fall asleep with my friends around me, only place I know I feel safe, I'm gonna call this home. So, talk guys on the flip flop later. Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?

K.D.

Realizing...

Realizing that a Pandora playlist with Mumford and Sons, Bob Dylan, Jakob Dylan, Coconut Records, and The Avett Brothers makes for some really good music for the mood I'm in.

Realizing that science will never hold my attention.

Realizing that studying biology just makes me want to cook and listen to music and write and watch movies based on old literature.

Realizing it's probably a sign that you should stop doing what you're doing when doing it makes you want to do something that's the complete opposite of what you're doing.

Realizing that I'm kind of bored with my life right now, and that makes me sad. I thought that wasn't supposed to happen once you're in charge of your own life.

Chris Mo

To friend or not to friend...

That is the question.

It is the curse of my generation

To think that anyone, anywhere cares about my thoughts or doings. How the heck did we get so self important? It's so freeing to think I don't matter at all

I haven't fallen off the face of the earth

Initial Impression Teal Baby Announcements

Shutterfly has custom baby invitations and birth announcements.

View the entire collection of cards.

It is

COLD as

Biology Chapter One:

Most boring thing ever? Yes. Ughhhh, biology. It just makes me feel bad inside when I think about it.

Anyways, I was bored of that last post. Mostly I was bored with all the things I am doing right now. Also, I lost my ID card again maybe, I think. FML. Also, I have spent upwards of $600 on books this semester. Holy hell.

K.D.

Now find your power animal